A fond farewell to 2014 from Karl Radl at Semitic Controversies

[yankeedoodle]

Remembering 2014: Five Weird Things claimed as 'Anti-Semitic'
http://semiticcontroversies.blogspot.com/

By way of remembering 2014, a year which is rapidly passing out of the present and into history, I thought it apt to quickly run down all the weird things that jews have called anti-Semitic in 2014.

The first, and perhaps most obvious, is Twitter with jewish British MP Luciana Berger claiming the platform was allowing her to be 'racially abused'.

But Lucy dear: I thought jews weren't a race, but rather a religious-cultural minority?

Hmmm... well annoying contradictions in terms aside. Most Brits (going by the comments on articles on her whinging) thought she should grow up and get a thicker skin, but the positively reptilian Berger seems unable to do anything but squeal like a stuck pig that she is 'offended'.

Well to be honest, as some Brits commented to her, if she is in British national politics she needs to grow a thicker skin... fast.

The second is, weirdly, Batman Returns. Jews and assorted other hypersensitive types have decided that the Penguin, one of the principal villains of the series, is actually a deliberate negative caricature of a jew and not a penguin at all.

Oh golly gosh: it isn't like the man who created the Penguin (Bob Kane [nee Robert Kahn]) was a jew himself (as was Milton 'Bill' Finger the other creator of the Batman comics)?

It couldn't just be that penguins have long beaks and just so happen to look a little bit like a stereotypical jew in the peculiar twilight of a crescent moon?

Well whaddya know: Penguins are anti-Semitic.

I hope nobody has told the Anti-Defamation League yet: you can just seem them demanding the United States legislature approve the immediate use of napalm on the south pole to fry those nasty anti-Semitic flightless birds.

Damn those Racist Nazi Penguins to hell.

Speaking of the Anti-Defamation League and their attempts to silence any kind of criticism of the jews brings me on to the third thing called anti-Semitic this year: any criticism of politicians who were born jewish.

I mean come on guys: is being jewish a 'Get Out of Jail Free' card in Monopoly or something?

Or is it like a secret handshake famous used by Freemasons and various (although often innocuous) 'secret societies' where your jewish buddies in the media scream 'anti-Semitism' whenever things aren't going your way and you are being criticized?

Do you meet in the local B'nai Brith Lodge for bagels and lox afterwards or something?

I'd ask if I could come along, but I am not a big fan of salmon let alone of kosher brined variety.

Although if you served a nice bacon sandwich I might just be tempted: although I couldn't do the whole circumcised-people-with-daddy-issues-will-rule-the-world thing.

Speaking of world domination brings me onto my penultimate weird thing called anti-Semitic in 2014: a swimming pool.

The best thing about said swimming pool (which had a giant swastika on the bottom of it) was the jewish outrage that:

A) It wasn't illegal as it was on private property.

B) It belonged, and was built by, a Professor of History.

The idea that someone could hold a PhD, as well as a much coveted tenured university position in a subject the jews have long sought to dominate and have a big swastika on their property that the jews couldn't make illegal brought the Brazilian and international jewish communities to the point of apoplexy.

Personally however I find the idea that a jew could have inadvertently taken a swim in said pool only to look down and promptly have a heart attack at what was staring right back at him rather heartwarming.

Oh well... good times...

That said my absolute favourite ludicrous claim of anti-Semitism (and which is a very late addition) is that relating to traditional Polish 'Lucky Jew' statues. Said statues allegedly bring good luck in financial matters to those non-jews who possess them (presumably without stealing everyone else's money to do it unlike the rather nefarious real deal) and are proving very popular with Poles in these hard economic times.

Jews however have decided that because statues use the traditional Polish jew of the shtetl as their image (i.e. they look like modern Hasidim/ultra-Orthodox jews) and have a direct connection in popular folklore to improved financial health: then this is anti-Semitic because it promotes the idea that jews are money-lenders and usurers as well as socio-cultural-religious outsiders (which they are and have always been by their own design).

Even if this is image is historically correct as it just happens to be [cf. the reason the jews were targeted by Cossacks and peasants during the Chmielnicki uprising were to do with their massively disproportionate role as tax farmers, agents of landlords and moneylenders in the Polish empire of the time] it is still 'evil', 'irrational' and 'anti-Semitic'.

Well apparently history and folklore are anti-Semitic and must be amended according to the whims of the self-chosen.


However I still think my favourite ever bit of lunacy on anti-Semitism was Alan Dershowitz's demand in his 1991 book 'Chutzpah' that Lutherans (and Protestants in general) condemn and divorce themselves from their founder, Martin Luther, because he criticized the jews and thus was per force 'anti-Semitic'.